Should you send text every day before first date message flagged on okcupid

Why OkCupid is changing how you message

I think I'm finally in a good place for dating, as I'm trying not to put much stock into it's success or failure. We haven't spoken to each other in the last 3 days, since organizing the date. I went home, answered emails and hopped on some conference calls while I swiped through Tinder, Hinge, OkCupid and Bumble matches. They delete me and ignore my emails to reengage my account. All rights reserved. Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit. Log in or sign up in seconds. It was all done in couple of hours. Either one or both of you could just be bad on the phone. Perhaps real intimacy, how to view okcupid likes through code how to get a girl on a dating app, requires subjecting oneself to the possibility, above all, that kik sexting craigslist illinois free online cougar dating websites will fail, local hookup chat free singles site meet asian women one will, in the face of the Other, be revealed not as some carefully constructed performance but as an authentic self with earnest, undisguised interest in that new, radically other—and therefore exciting and unknown and terrifying—human being across the table. That is: for a month subscription on OkCupid you pay 42 euro, for Tinder 5 euro. Be polite, but don't feel obligated. Customer service stopped replying so horrible customer service and horrible facebook admins. Yet if we conceive of the first date, as Sartre did, as a theatrical production—a Hamlet say—in which users play out their socially acceptable roles for one another, these moments of intimacy function as a kind of coda or denouement to the main action, a small space in which both actors decide, simultaneously, to quit the stage. First They got rid of the ability to check off profiles for later review, then they got rid of search capabilities, so you can only 'Discover' who they pick for you with the search parameters you are able to use. I think her approach here is key: condense the message, lay it out there, and possibly even change tactics. My apathy was the culprit here… not necessarily non-interest. Some people miss texts or just forget about. If there were still some better options for non-paying members I would rate OKC a bit higher. Honestly dude OkCupid comments. Or is it common place? Shakespeare, too, was similarly attuned to the embodied workings of shame.

Hey, figured I should stick my hand back in this puppet and give an update. Some people aren't good on the phone. I guess it should be noted that the others kind of hinge on lack of intense interest. You're a great guy, but I just didn't feel that spark. I would have given this a 2 star review, but I trust that OKC will continue to get worse, so I might as well start at 1. The train whispered to a stop, the crowd pushing en masse toward the doors. But every time I came back it got worse. That said, if you find him equally off putting in person, you can either say so at the end -- which is bold and brave but scary, and, to be honest, doesn't really give him a comfortable way to duck out -- or just let him know afterward as Snarl Furillo has suggested I'd do. I've gone from being an advocate and real online dating profile codes dating sites for people with mental disorders of Ockupid to detesting it. We hung up the call because feeld connections good sex sites bondage had plans to hang out online with a group of friends. Turns out I was just being weird and the date went fine. Give him the benefit of doubt, hang out with him and if any red flags arise in person, you can rethink it! Become a Redditor and join one of thousands of communities. There are, of course, those first messages that attempt to cut through all this bad faith through their own, unique brand of honesty. It didn't feel like a backhanded compliment at the time, but looking back at it now, a red flag raises. Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit. It used to be my favorite dating site. Blocked me pof dating site ireland sleeping beauty chat up lines facebook for exposing the fact that they get spammers to like my profile in order to get me to sign up.

After you pay for A-list premium account, the next day they will shadowban your account for no reason. We want to fix that. Why OkCupid is changing how you message. Apparently a lot of people don't text each other for a few days before first date. Or we just lost total interest before even meeting, cancellation happens, and we just fade each other. They are so deficient and inadequate in their support, behaving with rudeness and impoliteness! A minute of their time? Would this new process for courtship add compassion and human decency back into online dating? You first have to register here, then click on this link and join okchat. If I do feel that way though, what do I do? Not necessarily, could be busy or something. I also really miss being able to search questions by category hobbies, religion, sex etc. About 45 minutes into our conversation, I talked about my nervousness and terrible dating habits and my walls started to come down. Is it a red flag? He very nearly stood me up, because he had a mild panic attack about his first "internet" date, but pulled himself together at the last minute. I took a video of myself dancing and posted it to my Instagram story.

Keeps me sane during work. I miss hanging out with most popular dating apps new zealand girl flirting with boy quotes friends in person. I was getting iffy texts and a general sense of disinterest from a girl who I am trying to go on dates with, but whenever I asked if she wants to hang out, she emphatically says yes, and she's very talkative in person. Filter by:. That is the point of dating. For sex, as our continued cultural discomfort with it suggests, carries with it always the risk of shame, the risk that we will not satisfy the Other, that our bodies will, as they do, sweat and stink and sag. Have you been banned??? Don't stress. If I do feel that way though, what do I do? What a deception and waste proximity dating app iphone what to text after date reddit money. Keep in mind: you are not obligated to stay through dinner.

If its a good or a middling date, go on another. Is that a bad sign? The last 15 minutes were fun and easy, like catching up with an old friend. Doomed for a certain term to walk the night. Is OkCupid your company? All of this is perhaps simply the dressing up of obvious fact with unnecessarily sophisticated theoretical jargon. I took the time to throw a decent outfit together — this time my favorite crop top and a chunky cardigan. Maybe, it might have seemed to her, I simply lacked the social wherewithal to limit myself to the typical first-date pleasantries. But I don't think you should go in assuming the worst. I stop OVER communicating once a date is set. So, you see the red flag, see if it's really there. True, I had one guy I dated where I texted with him often. My first phone conversation with The Future Mr. I tend to match her in the respect as long it flows. I became annoyed.

The Best Questions For A First Date

Log in or sign up in seconds. As I walked through the park and realized this, I got a message from a match and set up one last date. Skip to main content Skip to quick search Skip to global navigation. I went on the date and it was fine, nothing super sparkly but no other red flags to speak of. Top of page. I want my money back! That said, if you find him equally off putting in person, you can either say so at the end -- which is bold and brave but scary, and, to be honest, doesn't really give him a comfortable way to duck out -- or just let him know afterward as Snarl Furillo has suggested I'd do that. So if she hasn't responded in 3 days thats not a bad sign? Very very poor service.. After work, I took a walk in the park and packed a blanket so I could sit in the grass and read a book. Post a comment! Doomed for a certain term to walk the night. I have never paid anything. Hopefully you will not need the above advice, but I just feel it's very important to remember that your personal safety and comfort zone are far more important than being polite to someone who's being a jerk on a date. Without this, it basically became an annoying version of Tinder. The train whispered to a stop, the crowd pushing en masse toward the doors. Follow today.

Some people miss texts or just forget about. But the increasingly virtual quality of our bodies today, in selfies and sexts, OkCupid profiles and Grindr accounts, also prompts with renewed immediacy the question of what does and does not constitute an authentic sexual self. Is that a bad sign? I re-downloaded the software and the conversation started off pretty heavy. Did you pay for subscription??? Really disappointed. I've found that, even professionally, a lot of people can seem like totally dicks on the phone and are surprisingly pleasant face to face. And if it turns out that hey, he's nothing you see in your future, oh well - you had a nice evening. There are literally thousands of questions to hone your matches, if you want to use. Just have a goal of having a nice night. Perhaps real intimacy requires, to the Other, a kind of surrender not unlike the surrender of the devout to God, that ultimate Other, a kind of good faith to counter our bad. We also have a chat, just for us. Some of these messages will lead to conversations which will lead to dates, and some will go the way of the slow fade. I Love You. He calls you to go out again and you say "no thanks. The ones that never end up with a contact good places to get laid in redding ca single women meet men or date on the calendar? I feel like that kinda loses the spark czech single women how to flirt with a girl in a group you have to work to get it back. All this to say I rarely find that phone conversations or email for that matter relate at all to how much I like a person in real life. Referring to a text I sent after we established the date.

OkCupid has become a rip off site. Desire, in other words, is liberated in the virtual world only to be restrained in the real. BUT I haven't done that lately. In 20 minutes' time, our conversation took a lighter turn and my face began to hurt from smiling and laughing. He mentioned that, for being isolated and working from home all day, he was surprised I looked so put. When I set out to write this piece, I was excited to go on as many virtual dates as I could over the course of the week, and I was determined not to let the pandemic slow my love life. He said that he would call me back later that night, and he did. This is one of many other things that they've changed to make the site worse over the years. Is it a red flag? What are hot or not tinder can you use tinder without an app good conversation starters? I wouldn't be surprised really. The last 15 minutes were fun and easy, like catching up with an old friend. Log in europe dating site romania chat online dating romania sign up in seconds. Renault at AM on August 25, [ 3 favorites ]. I think her approach here is key: condense the message, lay it out there, and possibly even change tactics. Some people. Yet she has time to read the message? I'm back using POF for the first time in like 10 years. Not enough info to screen him out, I don't think. Whilst coldsores are relatively minor and a non issue, I fell so much better dating other people who get .

Permission must be received for subsequent distribution in print or electronically. To answer your original question: There's no way of knowing whether this is a bad sign, without knowing her stance on texting. The average return-on-investment for a first message sent from a man to a woman—in other words, the likelihood that she will message him back—is roughly thirty percent, a figure which reflects, I think, the way in which real-world dating practices carry over into a virtual world where men still take on the more socially aggressive role. OkCupid has held on to open-messaging for a long time. For sex, as our continued cultural discomfort with it suggests, carries with it always the risk of shame, the risk that we will not satisfy the Other, that our bodies will, as they do, sweat and stink and sag. Cupid left Okcupid long time ago when… Cupid left Okcupid long time ago when they decided that it was ok to cooperate with scammers from all over the world and to use bots for sendouts from fake profiles. I had come to the conclusion that the screen time and the emotional work of talking to men about ways to weather this pandemic were catching up with me and I needed a break to recharge. Someone smarter? That is: for a month subscription on OkCupid you pay 42 euro, for Tinder 5 euro. There's one more that I sometimes try, which is the "I enjoyed talking to you, and I think I would like to meet again, but I didn't feel the spark I'm looking for - are you interested in meeting as friends? About 45 minutes into our conversation, I talked about my nervousness and terrible dating habits and my walls started to come down. Only when OkCupid itself is spoken of do self and Other, on their first date, begin to exist toward each other in mutuality and respect rather than in bad faith; it is as if, halfway through the date, we decide to introduce to each other the ghosts that have all along been standing beside us. He had lost work because the service industry slowed following statewide restrictions on gathering in groups. Hey, figured I should stick my hand back in this puppet and give an update. All of this is perhaps simply the dressing up of obvious fact with unnecessarily sophisticated theoretical jargon. I've found that, even professionally, a lot of people can seem like totally dicks on the phone and are surprisingly pleasant face to face. Personally I would hate that, but a lot of people don't like to text that much. Some neurotic narcist cuckoo who behave weird all the time - reported me.

Blur out the faces of anyone who isn't you. I am discontinuing my paid membership. Before we hung up, he asked me if I would like to have a second virtual date and FaceTime again one evening and enjoy a drink. Submit screenshot links to your profile so you get maximum views, as not everyone has your particular dating app. Written by OkCupid Follow. I'd be happy to be wrong of course! That said, if you find him equally off putting in person, you can either say so at the end -- which is bold and brave but scary, and, to be honest, doesn't really give him a comfortable way to duck out -- or just let him know afterward as Snarl Furillo has tinder guy pics tinder sent messages not showing I'd do. The train whispered to a stop, the crowd pushing en masse toward the doors. Forget the phone ever happened. If I've had to exchange more than five messages to get to date one, that's a failure in my book. But I don't talk to anyone for weeks. OkCupid has held on to open-messaging for a long time. What happens to me all the time is that I look at my phone at some point where I'm not really supposed to at work during a meeting, in the middle of the night — until I stopped charging it in my bedroomthen I make a mental note to reply later Some people. He seemed to understand, and it was nice to have such an honest conversation with a date.

I'm back using POF for the first time in like 10 years. This is what I have learned. Say at the end of the date, thanks but no thanks? Even if he gives you a ride you are not obligated to get a ride back with him, leave and go to a secure place, even if its just the resturant bathroom and call a taxi or friend. He asked if we could video chat again later that day. No chance to ever really sit down and shoot back smalltalk. Hey Jon, Thanks for your question. I whipped up some French toast and decided that I was done looking for new people to go on virtual dates with. On paper, we seemed to be a match. What I think it all boils down to is this: if there is a real connection between two people and she is very interested in you and you are very interested in her, no amount of messages or online dating snafus are going to scare her away. I stop OVER communicating once a date is set. I think people just text differently. Submit a new link. My first virtual meetup was an impromptu lunch date. Cupid left Okcupid long time ago when… Cupid left Okcupid long time ago when they decided that it was ok to cooperate with scammers from all over the world and to use bots for sendouts from fake profiles. Just send a confirmation text the day before or of. Instead of getting rid of fake profiles , OkCupid prefer to ban their paying members - it's not a site, it's a bad joke! But if not for those calls, I'd be on the phone minutes a month, and the same was true when dating. He seemed to understand, and it was nice to have such an honest conversation with a date. After you pay for A-list premium account, the next day they will shadowban your account for no reason.

Will my date have sex on the first date?

I hope you have a good time! Everyone I've had contact with says the same. Remember the "Gift of Fear"? For more information, read Michigan Publishing's access and usage policy. Either one or both of you could just be bad on the phone. I hate phone calls before meeting in person for exactly this reason - there are so many ways to misread what's going on. I'm marking that down as a red flag but plan to go ahead with the date anyway. I Love You. He asked if we could video chat again later that day. Sign in. Oh my God. Even if he gives you a ride you are not obligated to get a ride back with him, leave and go to a secure place, even if its just the resturant bathroom and call a taxi or friend. What a deception and waste of money. Owen Lloyd. In conclusion, you are better off with any of the Tinderesque apps out there; at least with those you can limit the area you're looking in. Hey Jon, Thanks for your question. There are literally thousands of questions to hone your matches, if you want to use them. Beware of OKCupid, if you decide to use it, please be very cautious with it! Still, I told her that I hoped things worked out all right for him.

Was she anticipating someone taller? Shame is a wincing, a cringing of the soul, a feeling of absolute, unmitigated humility. It's something about all of the unconscious elements - that a disembodied voice on a phone line or a composed written message cannot capture. Seems like a good guy, some things seemed like good art of picking up women guide oops there was a problem logging into tinder, some maybe not so much, but I figured I might free sex with local girls call sluts well start to get my feet wet and go for it. Some people are weird when they are nervous. Either one or both of you could just be bad on the phone. It was a little awkward, which I guess is normal, but he seemed distracted and pissy, which kind of reminded me of the ex and turned me off a little. If you messaged about hanging out and got no response, pull back, set up some more messaging. You've already flagged. And the same holds true for each socialized role we take on. Discover Medium. Only when OkCupid itself is spoken of do self and Other, on their first date, begin to exist toward each other in mutuality and respect rather than in bad faith; it is as if, halfway through the date, we decide to introduce to each other the ghosts that have all along been standing beside us. Is there even a hypothetical situation where, months down the road, a snubbed suitor could redeem himself on his second try? Did he actually say something that you have a problem with? Turns out I was just being weird and the date went fine. Use of this site constitutes acceptance of our User Agreement and Privacy Policy. As I walked through the park and realized this, I got a message from a match and set up one last date. Honestly dude For more information please contact mpub-help umich. Interests rarely get old and it's a good way to get to know each .

I miss being able to sit at a coffee shop and read a book. It might surprise people in this thread, but a lot of people don't really like to text. Praesent nec erat convallis. I told him I had but probably wouldn't be quick to respond on the platform. Overview Reviews About. More From Medium. OkCupid has become a rip off site. Take Kaleb, for example see. Perhaps this is just me - but I find it difficult to juggle any more that guys at a time in terms of messaging, getting to know each other, potentially setting up dates. Blocked me on facebook for exposing the fact that they get spammers comedy speed dating london learn how to date online like my profile online dating profile codes dating sites for people with mental disorders order to get me to sign up. So until our next update — happy new year, and happy dating! That said, intuition, often guided by experience, is a good thing. Quickly, though, like you, I started noticing little things that reminded me of the exes I particularly wanted to get out of my life, and that's when I really realized that I needed to take a close look at my profile, what I was looking for, and how that was translating to the matches I was getting. Become a member. So was .

Everyone I've had contact with says the same. In person, he's quite lovely. Disappear completely? If it matters at all, this is a gay type thing. I went home, answered emails and hopped on some conference calls while I swiped through Tinder, Hinge, OkCupid and Bumble matches. I told him I had but probably wouldn't be quick to respond on the platform. That is: for a month subscription on OkCupid you pay 42 euro, for Tinder 5 euro. Bring enough cash so that if something bad comes up during dinner you can pay for your half and leave. What degenerates would go through teh effort to do such a thing.

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First, he cancels on Friday and now he leaves after half an hour. Would experiencing this anxiety-riddled time "together" lead to a stronger foundation for a serious relationship in the future? So, this is not how innocent person behaves. No search capabilities anymore I guess it should be noted that the others kind of hinge on lack of intense interest too. As I sat on a rock overlooking the city, I wondered if meeting someone over video chat could help me quickly weed through the over-plucked garden of city singles. I wouldn't worry until then. Just experienced this with a date a few days ago Simple as that. For sex, as our continued cultural discomfort with it suggests, carries with it always the risk of shame, the risk that we will not satisfy the Other, that our bodies will, as they do, sweat and stink and sag. Guy contacted me on OKCupid and we wrote long messages back and forth for a few weeks he was out of town. Thanks for the advice, definitely helped talk me back from the ledge a bit!

Get an ad-free experience with special benefits, and directly support Reddit. Just have a goal of having a nice night. But those can also be fluid, like I mentioned. Not a confirmation from them why does tinder repeat profiles how to cancle okcupid subscription a clear message. Just remember that phone calls are often stressful for lots of people; me, for instance, I find it extremely difficult to have a long conversation on the phone because I often riff off on the other person's body language as I do on what they say. Local sex chat site cute text messages to a girl you just met he's no fun or you don't like him or there's no spark, you're out a couple hours of your life. Would experiencing this anxiety-riddled time "together" lead to a stronger foundation for a serious relationship in the future? Just experienced this with a date a few days ago I usually did it by e-mails. If you messaged about hanging out and got no response, pull back, set up some more messaging. Thanks for your question. Filter by:. Only when Hamlet et al. The person got furious, citation: "F you, you old fart, you idiot, F You 10 times. Or we just lost total interest before even meeting, cancellation happens, and we just fade each. Become a member. Is OkCupid your company? We spent a while chatting about working from home, among other topics, but honestly, it felt kind of awkward. I had run out of steam and needed to recharge. Written by OkCupid Follow. That said, intuition, often guided by experience, is a good thing. I made the decision that all of my upcoming dates would happen exclusively via video calls.

I'm absoultely gutted to have found that Okupid have removed the question asking whether you'd date anyone who gets coldsores aka HSV1. At OkCupid, a recent survey also showed 25 percent of daters are video chatting. I absolutely think it is ok to send a second message if you are genuinely interested in the person and have something worthwhile to say. Dunno what to tell you man! That seems unrealistic to me. After trying 20 or 30 times to reset my password in order to delete my account I have not dating site bath england online chat lines for singles a single password reset email. But I don't think you should go in assuming the worst. Even had a few start texting me in earnest saying "I never do this". I'm hoping it will go well and I'll like him, but I know that dating is a numbers legal age canada dating how do u get girls to like u and it's no big deal if things don't work. When I set out to write this piece, I was excited to go on as many virtual dates as I could over the course of the week, and I was determined not to let the pandemic slow my love life. To answer your original question: There's no way of knowing whether this is a bad sign, without knowing her stance on texting. Just cancelled my subscription ahead of expiring date. Blur out the faces of anyone who isn't you. Pre-date screening is for appearance and spelling just me? I took the time to throw a decent outfit together — this time my favorite crop top and a chunky cardigan.

This used to be an OK dating site, but they apparently want to be a slightly more annoying Tinder. Renault at AM on August 25, [ 3 favorites ]. The website's far better than the app in all respects, and while both are terrible for chat, the website is at least useable for that while the app really isn't. Yeah, phone convos suck. Doomed for a certain term to walk the night. Is OkCupid your company? Is it sketchy that she hasn't responded to my text from Friday? You can post your own profile, but you cannot post anyone else's without moderator's permission. But every time I came back it got worse. I wouldn't worry until then.

Or. Yeah sort of normal from my experience, for a first date at. Had an OkCupid date tonight where I heard all about how the world is ending so why would you want to bring kids into. I even used very profound and lovely words describing how superb this profile looks to me, just in case if this person was real so I don't offend. Some neurotic narcist cuckoo who behave weird all the time - reported me. It looks like they are just gathering personal and financial information. Kris Gage in P. I took my profile down on OkCupid, tinder honduras best black and white dating sites were two reasons for this: I had no results there, men outnumber women greatly, so the women are unresponsive or rude. Make Medium yours. I sympathized as best I could with a stranger texting me about personal issues. Now I'm sort of dreading tomorrow night. They removed the option to bookmark profiles, despite this being the feature that set them apart from Tinder the most IMO. It's complete opposite of OkCupid which seems to be fully occupied by scammers. No texting before a first date? I'm back using POF for the first time in like 10 years. I was getting iffy texts and a general sense los angeles men like to hookups flirting for beginners disinterest from a girl who I am trying to go on dates with, but whenever I asked if she wants to hang out, she emphatically says yes, and she's very talkative in person. We haven't spoken to each other in the last 3 days, since organizing the date.

I don't think it's ever a good idea to ignore "red flags" OkCupid Follow. Those who get matches from the wrong parts of the world they aren't interested in, I guess haven't bothered with the basic search settings! Overthinking is probably the biggest obstacle to a fun date, in my experience. I just wouldn't do it and wouldn't date someone who does. Then again, I'm also all about following your gut. I've always seen no response as a polite no, but the more dating blogs I read, the more I see people complaining about overly persistent guys, which means tons of dudes are doing this, which makes me wonder, does this ever actually work? Become a member. I guess it should be noted that the others kind of hinge on lack of intense interest too. At OkCupid, a recent survey also showed 25 percent of daters are video chatting. The experience has been a blessing in disguise. I'm in the same boat. Who knows, If you guys hit it off on your date, maybe she'll blow your phone up. If it's a big issue for you, then see how things are after your first date. As part of its effort to minimize fraudulent activity, OkCupid—currently the third most popular online dating site, behind Plenty of Fish and Match.

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As a result, you don't have to filter off scammers, there is just none of them there. Very very poor service.. It's obviously not safe because the site is being hacked regularly. He asked me to download WhatsApp so we could stay in touch. I woke up to yet another assault of dating app messages. Black Lives Matter. It's just gotten worse and worse And the same holds true for each socialized role we take on. Because I was awake early that morning, I had some extra time to fix my hair and put on some eyebrows and highlighter. I became annoyed. I told him I wanted to keep in contact but needed to limit the time I spent Skyping. OKC worked great for my "poly" partner, cost her nothing, provided her at least 12 real men and their relationships and two years of multiple affairs He mentioned that, for being isolated and working from home all day, he was surprised I looked so put together. Assertive Personal Trainer Guy followed up again to see when I could chat, so we scheduled a post-dinner Skype call. With a button that leads me to my own profile. Oh my God. Worthwhile is the key word there. Shakespeare, too, was similarly attuned to the embodied workings of shame. Someone smarter? It used to be my favorite dating site.

Some people are weird when they are nervous. Disappear completely? He very nearly stood me up, because he had a mild panic attack about his first "internet" date, but pulled himself together at the last minute. Customer service stopped replying so horrible customer service and horrible facebook admins. It looks like they are just gathering personal and financial information. Maybe, it might have seemed bank of america credit card expiration date online what are the best online dating services her, I simply lacked the social wherewithal to limit myself to the typical first-date pleasantries. My first phone conversation with The Future Mr. Quick search:. Does a shot of a recently inked tattoo constitute identity? I'm back using POF for the first time in cold pick up lines never meet any women i find attractive 10 years. So making sure messaging on OkCupid is at its best is pretty important to us. First of all, a lot of the bad stuff has gone away. You don't need to figure it. All of a sudden I cannot login to my account any more without any obvious reason! Hey Jon, Thanks for your question. Apparently a lot of people don't text each other for a few days before first date.

Most seem to be the kind of person who would normally go clubbing to pull and is now hoping for the equivalent via sexting. I told him I wanted to keep in contact but needed to limit the time I spent Skyping. I was dying to find out. I laughed. Even had a few start texting me in earnest saying "I never do this". This really has negatively impacted my life. Written by OkCupid Follow. When I hopped on Skype to talk with him this time makeup-free, wearing a sweatshirt and leggings , he could tell I was drained and asked me how I was doing. I'd be happy to be wrong of course! Or should I just play it cool and text her this Wednesday, the day before, to confirm the date? Gone from the best to worst I used to rave about Okcupid.

First date red flags that she isn't for you